Illustration by Danny Gregory.
A few weeks back, I was walking down Bloor Street when a bold sign in a window caught my attention. It was about male penguins and how rad they are for taking care of eggs while all the mothers are off looking for food. My quasi-feminist sensibilities caused me to do a double-take. There were more signs, one about fox fathers, one about sea-horse dads, all of them equally as flattering as the one before. “They’re not allowed to do that,” I thought to myself, “Don’t they know this kind of gender pride just comes off as insensitive and tired?” Then I thought it must be some horrible art installation. A comment on women’s-rights propaganda? Men are awesome too? I was reaching pretty far.
Actually, it was a retail store: Father’s Day was just around the corner.
We’re not used to giving love to men for being men. Men are jerks, or at the very least, stupid, if we’re to believe our TVs. And when we do give them love, it’s often by acknowledging traits which our society has deemed to be feminine. Sea-horse dudes carrying babies? Penguin papas guarding eggs? Is that the best we can do?
I had to think about it more.
I thought about my own dad, who, for part of my life, had to be both a mother and a father to me. He sat on the egg for a while, in a manner of speaking, and it was an incredibly self-sacrificial time. I’m sure we can all think of times when our fathers gave up hopes, dreams, or hobbies for their families. Even the so-called dumb dads.
Maybe that’s all the Father’s Day signage was really meaning to say. That all those animals, all the great dads, and all of creation is pointing us to a truly great Father. A Father with the kind of selfless love that looks pathetic and ugly to the hard-hearted. The kind of Dad that all of us want to grow up to be like, if we’re brave enough.
Take courage, dads. You’re doing us all a great service.
—Andrew Patten
